i am 17 years old almost 18 , and a year ago i was raped by my best friends cousin who at the time was also my friend and someone i trusted. I have always been a little messed up which might have to do with my 6 previous sexual assaults but i always told my self “It could be worse Nikki they could have raped you” i always thought as long as i don’t get raped the assaults i could get passed. Even my ex best friends 47 year old step dad telling me how in love with me he was and how beautiful i was and asking me to change in-front of him . Ugh i used to hate people who did this write their sad shit on the internet but fuck it . Girls out there i want you to remember something be careful please don’t fear the world and hate all men but just use your brain and if you feel unsafe leave never put your self in the situations i did .
I was bruised from my neck to my ankles .. i have a crooked spine now and my jaw it also crooked my neck curves backwards which could possibly kill me if i ever hit my head hard enough. He bite me, held me tight and “accidentally” hit my head on a chair but never actually hit me, but the things he did to me will always be in my mind forever even if he says he doesn’t remember that night. On the outside i may look normal but i’m fucked up inside .
God looking through my old stuff makes me so sad :/ but im 20 now and im so much stronger then i used to be .
We are stronger then this …. arn’t we ?
I am now :) 1 years clean and happy about it i still miss it but i can survive it <3 i see what my skin used to look like when this was me and i cant believe i took these photos today started shitty but i found this and remembered it used to be worse !
“Pepper, pay attention to me”
I guess she forgot to take him or a walk today
if anyone needs me i’ll just be over here laughing for the next ten years